The book that changed my life.


Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.

Nothing others do is because of you.

Find the courage to ask questions and express what you really want.

Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse and regret.

Sometimes we hear words that speak to our soul. Well, for me it wasn't so much about hearing the words as it was reading them. I found a book (don't worry I'll tell you the title before the end of the post) a while back. I read it because of a phase I was going through. Turns out, it wasn't a phase. It was part of my journey. It was all a part of who I was to become. It is a part of who I am today.

I went into the library with a purpose. I had done my research. I knew what I was looking for. I knew what section it would be under and what it's library call number was at our local branch. I was excited! I had a mission and I wanted to complete it. I found the book, checked it out, drove home, and read.

I read day in and day out. I read through the night. I made notes on post-its and I read it again. I looked up the book online. I read posts and comments from communities and from review websites. I visited the book's website. And I still wasn't satisfied.

I kept the words tucked in the back of my mind. I returned the book. I kept my post-its. I kept them in a journal. I wrote about it a little bit and then I moved on. I felt a bit lost. I wanted the book to be something more. I expected it to changed my life, right then. It didn't.

I forgot about it for the most part. But it still rumbled in the back of my mind. I thought about those words, the quotes written above. Those words come from that book. Those words exist in my own penmanship, written on post-it notes inside a journal. But they aren't my words.

Those words are about peace. They are about finding strength at the end of the day to be at peace. To be calm and to be happy.

It took me over a year to get to where I wanted to be when I finished that book. It took me processing time. It took me work and dedication. And it took my subconscious finally jumping on board and helping me along on this journey.

I still work at it every day. I don't know when or if it will ever become something that I don't have to work at. I think that is the ultimate goal, but it is not where I am today.

Last summer, I read The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz. It was my handbook to life. It was something that I wanted for myself more than I wanted anything else. It was about peace. It was about a life that I wanted. But it was about something that was not attainable at the time.

I realize now that I processed the book over the past year. I took in those words and I made them a part of who I am. There are four agreements that you must make with yourself in order to find peace. I don't believe that I have fully attained that yet. But I am on my way and I am proud of the strides that I have made. And I am definitely more at peace with my life today than I was a year ago.

I now have a new copy of the book. It sits on the make-shift table beside my bed. It hasn't been opened but it serves as a reminder. And soon it will have a new set of post-its inside of it. It will have my new goals and how I can attain them. It will have highlighter marks and bent pages. It will have my dreams and my hopes inside of it. Because in this life, I want peace.

I want peace for me and I want peace for you.

CONVERSATION

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