On Life and Honesty

So we all know how time consuming and hard blogging can be at times. Well teaching definitely gives blogging a run for its money. So shout out to all the teacher's who blog about school and lessons and all that other stuff, YOU ROCK! And I literally cannot figure out how you do it.
So that's my basis for being MIA for a few weeks--has it been that long?

I honestly have been so satisfied with my life the past few days. I feel like I am finally settling into this place that I now call home. I am creating my story! And even though I may not be writing about it here, I am living it and that is so exciting to me.

It seems that when I neglect my blog, I also neglect instagram... I don't know why but they co-exist in my brain. So tonight I posted an update on instagram and decided it was time for a blog chat.

So first, go read this. It's from two years ago but the girl is gold. I promise it's good!
I'll wait for you to finish reading ;)

Gold, right? I told you.

So I've got this thing about being honest. It's real simple. You just do it. You just be honest. Are you going to hurt some people's feelings? Yea, you probably will. There see, I was honest. I didn't lie to make you feel better and say that everyone is going to be alright with it. Because, honey, they aren't.

People aren't always going to like you. They aren't always going to agree with what you are saying. But you have to say it anyway. You have to speak for you. You have to make sure your voice is heard. Because at the end of the day, if you aren't looking out for you--no one else it either. Honest.

I was feeling a bit lost for a while. I was trying so hard to please people. I wanted to make friends. I want to seem like I had it all together. I wanted to make life perfect. Well life got real honest, real fast. Life isn't perfect. It never is going to be. And the sooner you realize this and get over it, the better.

I wrote a post a little while ago about how life can be messy. Actually, it was about how life is messy--not can be. It is. And that is okay. Life can be messy but if it's an HONEST messy, it is manageable.

Sometimes life throws you a curve ball. Sometimes it's an ugly curve ball--a nasty comment about you, a snide remark, a dirty look. But sometimes it's a nice curve ball--a call from an old friend, a letter in the mail, a compliment. You have to learn to deal with each of things in stride and you need to move forward.

Control. That's a big word in my life. I actually hate the word. But I have a desire for control. I want to know the outcome of something before it happens. Unknowns make me uncomfortable. Honest.

I'm opinionated and proud. I am stubborn. And I have a voice. 
It took me a long, long time to get where I am today. I spent plenty of time sitting back and listening to someone else. I followed plans that I didn't always agree with--and I knew that I couldn't be upset with the outcomes. But I was upset. I was upset because it didn't work. But I was also upset because I didn't say anything. I spent years battling with myself in order to get to where I am today.


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