It's My Party and I'll Cry If I Want To

I woke up this morning in birthday beads and with half the contents of my closet on my bed. Happy Birthday weekend to me :)

Let me preface this by saying that I have become terrible at taking pictures when I am out with friends... I used to remember it occasionally. Not so much anymore. So this is gonna be mostly a collection of words with some snapchats and the occasional other photo thrown in. Maybe I'll make photography a goal for this 24th year of my life... but probably not.

I really do love my job. I brought party hats in for all of my kids and they were so excited. They had been asking about Friday all week; knowing full well that I LOVE a birthday party. Ask my wonderful college roomies who threw me a surprise party a few years ago -- love y'all the most! So we wore our party hats and did all the academic things for the day in the morning. In the afternoon, we finger painted for Earth Day and took silly pictures with our messy hands. I can't share those pictures for privacy reasons, but trust me they are so cute! Then we had a snack from a wonderful parent and they watched an Earth Day video so I could be a responsible teacher and grade their assessments from the morning. We had a recess dance party and popsicles to celebrate my birthday. The fifth graders came outside and sang happy birthday to me. It was precious, even though I really hate that song. When it was time to go home my babies said they had "the most fun day ever" and some confused littles said they loved celebrating Earth Day and couldn't wait for next year. To their teachers next year, I apologize in advance! They thought my birthday celebrations were for Earth Day... you've got some big shoes to fill ;)

Friday Night
Since Meagan wouldn't be around on Saturday to celebrate the day with me, we decided on dinner Friday night. Morgan, Meagan, and I went out to hibachi for dinner. And call me crazy but I was still on a happy high from my day at school. I had an abundance of energy, laughing hysterically at everything, dancing on the coffee table, and singing obnoxiously. We finished the night with ice cream and playing Mario Kart. I'd share pictures from this night, but most of them feature me embarrassing myself - just go ahead and picture that yourself.

I am so thankful for friends who will change their plans to spend my day with me! Originally Cassie and Caileen both had other plans for this weekend, but they changed them to hang out with me. The plan was to go to the beach for the day, find somewhere to have dinner, then go dancing at night. But as things tend to go in my life, plans change. I woke up in the morning having a feeling that something wasn't gonna work out how I wanted it to... checked the weather for the beach and it was gonna be partly cloudy all day with spotty chances of showers. Not exactly the ideal beach weather and I couldn't convince myself that it would be worth the 2 hour drive.
Caileen, Cassie, and I at the Dogwood Festival
So we changed our plans to include the Dogwood Festival downtown and dinner out to Olive Garden. We walked around the festival (people watching as it will be), eating all the yummy treats (chocolate dipped ice cream and cheese cake and funnel cake), and shopping. It was the perfect afternoon. We made plans to meet up for dinner later, giving everyone time to go home in between.

As fate will have it, my body/mind decided that we couldn't get through the day without a panic attack. And so began the fun rounds of pushing back dinner and changing all my evening plans... I really could have stayed in my bed and been happy but I knew I'd regret that later. So I forced myself up, took an anxiety pill, got dressed, and moved forward with my day.

Saturday Night (Part 1)
After changing my outfit 6 times and sitting on my bathroom counter hating everything about my hair, I made my way out the door. Not without some supportive words from those truly dear to me though.
Life is a crazy adventure and knowing who really wants the best for you isn't always so plain to see. But I've got a few whom I am lucky enough to know will always be there to keep me treading water.
As I was driving to Olive Garden with shaking hands, I repeated that mantra that everything would be okay once I was with my friends. And once I got there, I could sense myself finally begin to relax. We had a good time laughing over bread sticks, salad (or soup if you're Shane), and pasta. It was a wonderful turn of events from the previous two hours for me. It's incredible the power your friends can have over your happiness and I will forever be grateful for people who can make me laugh.

Saturday Night (Part 2)
After dinner I ran home to take a benadryl for the ever present hives and convinced Morgan to come to Raeford with me to meet Adam for my birthday. I would say that I can be pretty convincing when I want to be, but it actually didn't take much. After I quickly painted my nails and changed out of my sweater, we headed out the door.
I love him the most
Now I'll spare you the details of my whole night but just know that it included snorting from laughing so much, dancing with my best friend, wearing a tiara and birthday beads at the bar, discussing "tinder on paper," countless snapchat videos of our nonsense, and to everyone's surprise including my own -- sex on the beach (the drink, you dirty minded people). Jury's still out on if I'll drink again but I had a really good night with some of my favorite people.

When I got home and plugged in my dead phone, there was a collection of text messages, snapchats, and voicemails. Apparently, you aren't supposed to let your phone die on your birthday... my bad.

Now I'm no stranger to the fact that life is a rollercoaster, full of the ups and downs. And birthdays aren't excluded from that rollercoaster. But even with those lows scattered in throughout the weekend, I had a really good birthday. And that's all thanks to the wonderful people who have taught me about true friendship and dealt with me while I am learning to love myself again.

I'm still waiting on that ice cream cake though ;)


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