An Overdue Goodbye

A heart is a fragile thing. That's why we protect them so vigorously, give them away so rarely, and why it means so much when we do. Some hearts are more fragile than others. Purer, somehow. Like crystal in a world of glass, even the way they shatter is beautiful.  --Unknown

It took me four years to get over you, the first time. And you didn't care. You let me think you cared. That was the hard part. When someone pretends to care and you are naive enough to think they under everything else, they still do care. Stop kidding yourself, they don't. Congratulations on breaking my heart. And yes, it was years ago. And yes, I said I was over it.

After all these years, you reach out on a random Wednesday night. And I bite because I'm weak and that's who I am. I never let go. But that was it. A random, lonely night for you--it was more to me. And you just disappeared again. One conversation and you clearly got what you were looking for and that was it.

And I can't do this to myself anymore.
It hurts. A physical pain. An emotional pain. An all over pain. But I am done. I am letting go because I deserve better. And I guess you do too. I've given you a bad name to more of my friends than I can count. It made me feel better to talk negatively about you. But down inside of me, I still cared. And no matter how many times I told a friend about the awful way my heart was broken, I still forgave you. But I can't anymore.

I'm finally strong enough to let go, to say goodbye. I am finally able to free my heart from you. I don't deserve it anymore. And while it may take me some time to fully open myself up to someone again, at least I know that I am willing to now.

To most people this is just me getting over some boy who I once loved. But for me it is so much more. It is me letting go of the one person who kept me from truly loving anyone else.

So goodbye to you.

Heartfelt Lies by Ron Pope on Grooveshark

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