People Pleasing


It's true, ya know? You can't make everyone happy. You can try, but you tend to make yourself miserable in the process. Take my word for it.

"It's in our nature to care about what other people think. We live in a state of perpetual fear over the thoughts and opinions of others. It's sad, but our daily actions are often motivated by obtaining the approval of others. There's an obsession with making sure we don't disappoint those around us, and this is most usually in exchange for our own happiness."  -- Lauren Martin



I tend to worry about other people before even beginning to think about myself. I figure if I can make other people happy, I'm doing something right. I want people to like me. I don't like to hurt anyone's feelings... I mean who does? But I'm starting to learn that sometimes it is inevitable.

Trying to keep the peace with everyone all the time will exhaust you. 

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I'm learning that people tend to throw around words that they think will hurt, just simply to make you think a certain way. But words only hold as much value as you let them. For instance, the first time my dad said he was disappointed in me -- it killed me. I was in high school and I still remember how it felt to have him say that to me. I cried for days. I never wanted to feel like that again. I hate to disappoint people. Now, if I chose not to partake in your weekend escapades and you want to say you are disappointed in me... that doesn't hold the same value. I'm sorry that I didn't hang out with you but really disappointed? Not the right word, and I don't get the same "punched in the gut" feeling that I did when my dad said it to me all those years ago. You need to use your vocabulary correctly.

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I'm a people pleaser by nature and I doubt that it will change anytime soon. But I am starting to learn that my happiness needs to mean something as well. Sometimes to be happy, you have to let other things go -- such as impressing everyone else. One step at a time ladies and gents, one step at a time.

CONVERSATION

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